If you ever decide to have kids,
for goodness sake when/if you want their help, don't criticize about everything else before demanding for help. Ask kindly.
-Keep talking with them. From toddler to horomonic-teen to adult. It's important you communicate. But be Kind.
-Even when angry, be stern yet kind.
-Don't ever be cruel.
-Don't ever ignore them on purpose.
-What you sow is what you reap.
Thursday, 15 January 2009
Monday, 12 January 2009
Indifferent
I've got to a point where I feel and live for the moment, but I am apathetic about everything of the past/future. I am happy when I am happy, and down and out in another hour or so. I share a wonderful moment with a person, yet then I know. Again. However much you care about a person, a lover, a friend. They will leave. Or they will let you down on your expectations. The expectations you didn't try to have, knowing they will be let down. But we all can't help ourselves, we all do build expectations, even a small one. Only human. So I live for the moment. For now I have the luxury to do so. One day I might not.
Oh well..
In the end we all die. Why do anything? Only thing noble I see than living the selfish life for yourself is to live it to make it all better and happy for someone else. but for what? In the end, again you might be fulfilling your own self satisfaction of helping someone else (the feel good factor). Those people die too. I don't believe in heaven and hell. Karma, maybe. But I have my doubts there too.
On the other side of things..
Who is a patriotic?
I cannot believe/hope the end of a war will solve everything for Sri Lanka. It will solve some problems. But what about everything else? You know what I mean. We all know what I mean. But we try to shut out all those questions, by hanging on to a hope of a wonderful tropical paradise island where unicorns poop rainbows. You can't ignore everything else and call yourself a patriotic, just by changing a fb profile pic, or pounding your chest and saying you have a duty to save your motherland, while your brothers fuck it up, or flying the national flag on your roof, or being there in spirit. YET doing nothing to make a change, or worse off ignoring it all.
I am afraid the end of the war will bring another repitition of history. I overheard a conversation between some very educated elderly people in the country. People who have gone through the past 60-70 years of unrest. People who have feared for their new born kids safety in the 83 riots. People who claim they are patriots, and want to see peace. YET, they still haven't learned. They still talk about tamils like every tamil out there who comes to buy/rent a house is a criminal. They talk about muslims like every muslim out there is a dirty old scumbank looking for money. Generalisation goes and works only a certain way. How do we co-exist without learning to accept that each of us are different and we might not be any different than those same generalisation/racist comments in case we were born to a tamil/muslim mother. None of us are superior than the other. How can we hope for a secular land when the people who have gone through all the shit, still thinks in their age-old ways.. And power blinds you and makes you forget your roots. And children of the future are spoonfed those same things, all over again.
In the end we are all trying to get through, until we die. We are all alone. We are all selfish. We are all hypocritical. And everthing is temporary.
Oh well..
In the end we all die. Why do anything? Only thing noble I see than living the selfish life for yourself is to live it to make it all better and happy for someone else. but for what? In the end, again you might be fulfilling your own self satisfaction of helping someone else (the feel good factor). Those people die too. I don't believe in heaven and hell. Karma, maybe. But I have my doubts there too.
On the other side of things..
Who is a patriotic?
I cannot believe/hope the end of a war will solve everything for Sri Lanka. It will solve some problems. But what about everything else? You know what I mean. We all know what I mean. But we try to shut out all those questions, by hanging on to a hope of a wonderful tropical paradise island where unicorns poop rainbows. You can't ignore everything else and call yourself a patriotic, just by changing a fb profile pic, or pounding your chest and saying you have a duty to save your motherland, while your brothers fuck it up, or flying the national flag on your roof, or being there in spirit. YET doing nothing to make a change, or worse off ignoring it all.
I am afraid the end of the war will bring another repitition of history. I overheard a conversation between some very educated elderly people in the country. People who have gone through the past 60-70 years of unrest. People who have feared for their new born kids safety in the 83 riots. People who claim they are patriots, and want to see peace. YET, they still haven't learned. They still talk about tamils like every tamil out there who comes to buy/rent a house is a criminal. They talk about muslims like every muslim out there is a dirty old scumbank looking for money. Generalisation goes and works only a certain way. How do we co-exist without learning to accept that each of us are different and we might not be any different than those same generalisation/racist comments in case we were born to a tamil/muslim mother. None of us are superior than the other. How can we hope for a secular land when the people who have gone through all the shit, still thinks in their age-old ways.. And power blinds you and makes you forget your roots. And children of the future are spoonfed those same things, all over again.
In the end we are all trying to get through, until we die. We are all alone. We are all selfish. We are all hypocritical. And everthing is temporary.
Thursday, 8 January 2009
All Hail..
the bullshit Sri Lankan patriotism spoon fed to the modayas of our times.. You, Orion, and I, can all march on to a time of state terrorism now. (30s exposure up at my neighbourhood sky while pondering about our times)
Saturday, 3 January 2009
Truly India..
I thought I didn't find a favourite movie for 2008, and then I watched this. Hadn't heard much about the movie beforehand other than a few friends talking about it, and as I sat down to watch it my only knowledge about it was that it was about this boy in India.
And I was sucked in. To a different world.. of a slumdog.
It captures an array of emotions through a traumatized childhood, exposes the viewer to the harshest realities of modern day India, and yet has a fantasy like ending. What I wonder is whether most of us living on greener pastures, will ever seriously contemplate that this kind of poverty is possible.
As the title suggests Slumdog Millionaire is a story of rags to riches, set in the slums and corruption of India. I will leave you to watch the movie and form your own opinion, but simply put, I found it to be brilliant. The movie managed to leave an overwhelmingly indelible effect on me. Especially the first few chapters of Jamal ‘the chaiwallah’s’ childhood. I teared as I remembered a boy I met in India sometime back while walking on the midst of a paddyfield. Yes, you read that correct :) I got the chance to travel all over northern India, and it was far from what I expected. The multitude of incidents one can achieve by traveling about India I believe is another story. But this boy..., I can still remember his face, better than all the faces of street children I photographed.
This particular place lied in the middle of a beautiful paddyfield around an area usually frequented by thousands of Sri Lankans each year, thus a lot of the beggar children knew Sinhala. We had to walk single file along the paddyfield for about half a kilometer and the kids appear from all over the forest skirts and come running along to ‘greet’ the foreigners. If you have been to India, you would know how street children behave, though these were more of a village version of street-children. It’s like they have their own school on how to beg&win and how to clam at foreigners. To be honest, it gets tiring and terrifying, coz they are not satisfied how much ever you try to give and they get gang up on you if they know you are vulnerable. Previous personal experience on this trip left me terrified of them as I got almost attacked by such a ‘mob’. So when our tour guide for the day told us to be careful on this particular journey through the paddyfield, I took note. We were further told that a lot of kids in the area spoke Sinhala very fluently upto the expertise that they could actually explain the place in Sinhala. I thought ‘yah right’. Little did I know.
So there we were walking along, the usual group of kids coming from behind and front with the same chant and facial expression. It’s depicted in exact in the movie. I fell behind a bit as I was stopping every once in awhile to take in the beautiful scenery unfolding. It was the greenest a paddyfield could be, and the dark mountains in the distance and the forest alongside, and the blueness of the sky was enough to just make you want to sit and stare around in awe. By this time of the trip, I had learned how to ignore the kids, and a lot of them realized I was more interested in clicking my camera, and moved towards the foreigners in front. As harsh as the ignoring part sounds, it’s a surviving skill. That’s how bad it can get.
When I realized I had fallen back I decided to quicken up a bit and I noticed this young boy looking around 17 years of age, weaving his way through the banks of the paddyfield. He ended up walking in front of me, and shooed away the young kids in front and behind me, telling them not to bother me. He said, ‘hello sister’. I lifted my ignorant focus from the ground in front, to his face and eyed him suspiciously. Also checked up on where the tour guide is upfront. Just in case. Walking singlefile along a narrow bank in the middle of paddyfied leaves you nowhere to run if the person infront of you tries anything. Dark in complexion, he was wearing an old yet clean baggy shirt that was buttoned loosely, and blue school shorts (just like in SL). The tour guide noticed him, and shouted something back to the boy in Hindi. And he replied right back and I don’t think the tourguide saw any harm. I didn’t either, though I was guarded. My reaction to his first hello was a mere glare so he tried again. “My name is Raj sister, don’t worry I wont harm you” He spoke my mind and I couldn’t help but slightly smile at his quite innocent and straight forward statement. I still didn’t speak. I had learned that it was trouble if you start speaking to the kids even out of curiousity, coz then they just wont leave you alone. He kept on trying. “sister, why are you ignoring me, I just want to talk. Mata salli epa, mama kemathi ne ekata”. I was surprised by the ease he said those words. He spoke perfect sinhala. He realized the sinhala worked, and he grinned at me.
Raj - oya ai surprise wela, mata hondata sinhala puluwan. (why are you surpised, I can speak sinhala well )
Me- Silent awe.
Raj – baya wenna epa sister, mata oney oyath ekka katha karanna. Igena ganna. (don’t worry sister, I only want to talk with you. to learn)
I finally broke my silence at this and asked him “Why? you like sinhala?”
Raj- ai mata igena ganna oney? Mama kemathi wena languages igena ganna ( Why do I want to learn, I like learning other languages)
Thus, I started talking with him. Mostly in sinhala. All the way upto the place we were sightseeing and back. I learned that he learned sinhala from talking to the Sri Lankans who come there. And from some of the local guides who knows Sinhala there. He said it’s an easy language to learn. I learned that he was just about to finish school, and wants to study further, but he couldn’t afford it. When asked what he was going to do, he said he’s going to teach the village kids until he can save up some money. I asked him why they don’t bother to go to school, why they beg, when they have schools with teachers. He told me he tries, he tries to make them come to school, coz they are even given free food if they attend school. But it’s so much in the system that they prefer begging to school, they eat the food and go back to the street. Raj was wise for his age and society he grew up in. He knew the value of learning despite his surroundings.
He gave me a private tour guide almost, told me the historical significance of the area and a bit about his family. His father was a carpenter. They were struggling to make ends meet but he told he also contributed from working on weekends while schooling. Sold souvenirs to foreigners on the street. Taught kids. Ran errands. Then he asked me what and where I study. I was at a loss of words for a moment. He realized my sudden pause, gave me a wide eyed smile, and said, it’s okay sister I know we are different, don’t feel uncomfortable. ‘Different’ .. exact words he used. He was such a sweet honest kid. I almost found it unbelievable. I told him what I study and what I plan to do. It was such a refreshing moment, I wanted time to stand still. He wanted to study further, but he still wanted to become a teacher in the end. He was telling me how we always have to keep learning from everything :) It was almost like an advise. We also talked about the weather, the recent floods there. I told him it was too sunny today, he told me yes you might get dark sister, good that you are wearing the cap. It was an almost teasing yet again all in goodwill comment I was left to wonder yet again how to react.
As we reached towards the village huts again, he paused, backed away a bit and said “this is where we say goodbye sister thank you for talking with me”. Told me it was really nice meeting me and maybe we will meet again. I was stuck at what to say again. I smiled with him and told him that it was nice to meet him too, and to keep on studying no matter what. He smiled his white-toothed smile at me, along with his boyish attitude of hands casually stuck in his short-pockets and slightly bowed his head in goodbye. I walked the rest of the distance smiling at what just occurred. This sweet polite kid just made my day, gave me faith that honest extraordinary people still exist even in the most unsuspecting corners of the world.
Raj, thank you. I hope you always keep smiling that sincere smile even with the struggles of life to come your way. I only wish I took your address down.
This was the paddyfield >
:)
And I was sucked in. To a different world.. of a slumdog.
It captures an array of emotions through a traumatized childhood, exposes the viewer to the harshest realities of modern day India, and yet has a fantasy like ending. What I wonder is whether most of us living on greener pastures, will ever seriously contemplate that this kind of poverty is possible.
As the title suggests Slumdog Millionaire is a story of rags to riches, set in the slums and corruption of India. I will leave you to watch the movie and form your own opinion, but simply put, I found it to be brilliant. The movie managed to leave an overwhelmingly indelible effect on me. Especially the first few chapters of Jamal ‘the chaiwallah’s’ childhood. I teared as I remembered a boy I met in India sometime back while walking on the midst of a paddyfield. Yes, you read that correct :) I got the chance to travel all over northern India, and it was far from what I expected. The multitude of incidents one can achieve by traveling about India I believe is another story. But this boy..., I can still remember his face, better than all the faces of street children I photographed.
This particular place lied in the middle of a beautiful paddyfield around an area usually frequented by thousands of Sri Lankans each year, thus a lot of the beggar children knew Sinhala. We had to walk single file along the paddyfield for about half a kilometer and the kids appear from all over the forest skirts and come running along to ‘greet’ the foreigners. If you have been to India, you would know how street children behave, though these were more of a village version of street-children. It’s like they have their own school on how to beg&win and how to clam at foreigners. To be honest, it gets tiring and terrifying, coz they are not satisfied how much ever you try to give and they get gang up on you if they know you are vulnerable. Previous personal experience on this trip left me terrified of them as I got almost attacked by such a ‘mob’. So when our tour guide for the day told us to be careful on this particular journey through the paddyfield, I took note. We were further told that a lot of kids in the area spoke Sinhala very fluently upto the expertise that they could actually explain the place in Sinhala. I thought ‘yah right’. Little did I know.
So there we were walking along, the usual group of kids coming from behind and front with the same chant and facial expression. It’s depicted in exact in the movie. I fell behind a bit as I was stopping every once in awhile to take in the beautiful scenery unfolding. It was the greenest a paddyfield could be, and the dark mountains in the distance and the forest alongside, and the blueness of the sky was enough to just make you want to sit and stare around in awe. By this time of the trip, I had learned how to ignore the kids, and a lot of them realized I was more interested in clicking my camera, and moved towards the foreigners in front. As harsh as the ignoring part sounds, it’s a surviving skill. That’s how bad it can get.
When I realized I had fallen back I decided to quicken up a bit and I noticed this young boy looking around 17 years of age, weaving his way through the banks of the paddyfield. He ended up walking in front of me, and shooed away the young kids in front and behind me, telling them not to bother me. He said, ‘hello sister’. I lifted my ignorant focus from the ground in front, to his face and eyed him suspiciously. Also checked up on where the tour guide is upfront. Just in case. Walking singlefile along a narrow bank in the middle of paddyfied leaves you nowhere to run if the person infront of you tries anything. Dark in complexion, he was wearing an old yet clean baggy shirt that was buttoned loosely, and blue school shorts (just like in SL). The tour guide noticed him, and shouted something back to the boy in Hindi. And he replied right back and I don’t think the tourguide saw any harm. I didn’t either, though I was guarded. My reaction to his first hello was a mere glare so he tried again. “My name is Raj sister, don’t worry I wont harm you” He spoke my mind and I couldn’t help but slightly smile at his quite innocent and straight forward statement. I still didn’t speak. I had learned that it was trouble if you start speaking to the kids even out of curiousity, coz then they just wont leave you alone. He kept on trying. “sister, why are you ignoring me, I just want to talk. Mata salli epa, mama kemathi ne ekata”. I was surprised by the ease he said those words. He spoke perfect sinhala. He realized the sinhala worked, and he grinned at me.
Raj - oya ai surprise wela, mata hondata sinhala puluwan. (why are you surpised, I can speak sinhala well )
Me- Silent awe.
Raj – baya wenna epa sister, mata oney oyath ekka katha karanna. Igena ganna. (don’t worry sister, I only want to talk with you. to learn)
I finally broke my silence at this and asked him “Why? you like sinhala?”
Raj- ai mata igena ganna oney? Mama kemathi wena languages igena ganna ( Why do I want to learn, I like learning other languages)
Thus, I started talking with him. Mostly in sinhala. All the way upto the place we were sightseeing and back. I learned that he learned sinhala from talking to the Sri Lankans who come there. And from some of the local guides who knows Sinhala there. He said it’s an easy language to learn. I learned that he was just about to finish school, and wants to study further, but he couldn’t afford it. When asked what he was going to do, he said he’s going to teach the village kids until he can save up some money. I asked him why they don’t bother to go to school, why they beg, when they have schools with teachers. He told me he tries, he tries to make them come to school, coz they are even given free food if they attend school. But it’s so much in the system that they prefer begging to school, they eat the food and go back to the street. Raj was wise for his age and society he grew up in. He knew the value of learning despite his surroundings.
He gave me a private tour guide almost, told me the historical significance of the area and a bit about his family. His father was a carpenter. They were struggling to make ends meet but he told he also contributed from working on weekends while schooling. Sold souvenirs to foreigners on the street. Taught kids. Ran errands. Then he asked me what and where I study. I was at a loss of words for a moment. He realized my sudden pause, gave me a wide eyed smile, and said, it’s okay sister I know we are different, don’t feel uncomfortable. ‘Different’ .. exact words he used. He was such a sweet honest kid. I almost found it unbelievable. I told him what I study and what I plan to do. It was such a refreshing moment, I wanted time to stand still. He wanted to study further, but he still wanted to become a teacher in the end. He was telling me how we always have to keep learning from everything :) It was almost like an advise. We also talked about the weather, the recent floods there. I told him it was too sunny today, he told me yes you might get dark sister, good that you are wearing the cap. It was an almost teasing yet again all in goodwill comment I was left to wonder yet again how to react.
As we reached towards the village huts again, he paused, backed away a bit and said “this is where we say goodbye sister thank you for talking with me”. Told me it was really nice meeting me and maybe we will meet again. I was stuck at what to say again. I smiled with him and told him that it was nice to meet him too, and to keep on studying no matter what. He smiled his white-toothed smile at me, along with his boyish attitude of hands casually stuck in his short-pockets and slightly bowed his head in goodbye. I walked the rest of the distance smiling at what just occurred. This sweet polite kid just made my day, gave me faith that honest extraordinary people still exist even in the most unsuspecting corners of the world.
Raj, thank you. I hope you always keep smiling that sincere smile even with the struggles of life to come your way. I only wish I took your address down.
This was the paddyfield >
:)
Wednesday, 31 December 2008
'Licious Nine ya'll
See what a nice person Iam: Early morning today would have seen a lot of HR managers very happy after opening their prospective future employee emails, and seeing this from Spice. I do hope you didn't get caught red handed with that ensueing search for 'certain' flicks themed on new years..You are thinking about it now aren't ya!Tuesday, 30 December 2008
get over with it damn 2008
Been waiting for this year to be over.. the last few days seems slower somehow. But I really can't complain.. I had an awesome week that's got me thinking about a lot of things. I met a few bloggers actually! None of them had any idea though.
Anyhow, did something so-not-me few minutes back. I am on a beer buzz right now, and went on a whim and said something to someone. lol. This is going to be interesting. Wondering whether I will even get a reply email. (OT)
On a happier note, a certain someone is out with her family and bf right now. Sorta like meet the in-laws! I am truly happy for the couple since it seems like a big step and I can only imagine the feeling.
Now can I be more cryptic eh?
ooooh Happpppy New year peeps! It's just another turn of a day, but atleast us limited brained humans can be disillusioned into somekind of hope nay ? toodees
Anyhow, did something so-not-me few minutes back. I am on a beer buzz right now, and went on a whim and said something to someone. lol. This is going to be interesting. Wondering whether I will even get a reply email. (OT)
On a happier note, a certain someone is out with her family and bf right now. Sorta like meet the in-laws! I am truly happy for the couple since it seems like a big step and I can only imagine the feeling.
Now can I be more cryptic eh?
ooooh Happpppy New year peeps! It's just another turn of a day, but atleast us limited brained humans can be disillusioned into somekind of hope nay ? toodees
Tuesday, 23 December 2008
must.drink.beeer.
I want a Tshirt with this print!UPDATE : I got my beer last night :) with a doze of good food served by confused waiters after a crappy hindi movie.
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